time to take the dog for a walk
For Pete’s sake! Jim is now playing baby sitter to this cute little pink puppy named Pete.
not the tentacles
For this level, you have to protect Pete from the many hazards, like Tentacles…
hulk smash!
death count: 46
If you don’t, Pete has a REALLY bad split personality, and he will hulk out and take his anger out on poor Jim.
Whip Pete so he jumps over the gaps…
i don’t think this is the best path home
death count: 51
And protect him from falling asteroids.
stay! good boy!
Before you know it, you’ll have Pete safely back home, and we can move on.
Did something eat you Jim?! As the name implies, Intestinal Distress seems to take place inside of something.
doesn’t anyone chew their food anymore?
Going by the massive size, and whole fish, I’m going to say Chuck the junk yard owner caught up with our hero and ate him for what we did to him in the first level.
Wub Wub
This level is already gross looking, but it’s made so much worse by the background music. The music itself is very simplistic to the point of being almost non-existent, but there is a loud, ever-present heart beat that makes this level feel very tense.
death count: 58
There’s also not a lot of enemies in this level. It instead focuses on the timing and platforming. This just makes that heart beat so much more distracting.
The only real enemy you face comes in the form of Doc Duodenum.
death count: 71
This little bastard will jump around the screen, spraying bile when he lands, and was a real pain for me.
death count: 76
After many deaths of poor Jim, I finally managed to beat Doc Duodenum, and we are out of here.
Here we are, Buttville. We’re finally ready to confront Queen Slug for a Butt and rescue the beautiful Princess-What’s-Her-Name.
the number of spikes in this path is too damn high!
death count: 83
This level is pure hell. You start by having to helicopter down a very narrow, spike filled pit.
i’m getting dizzy
death count: 89
From there, we have the fun of trying to climb up this post by whipping a hook, turning around, and whipping the next hook before falling back to the start.
Intergalactic Cow
death count: 93
Hey look, the cow we launched showed up again. We really launched him far.
the suit is indestructible… except when it isn’t
death count: 108
I don’t know what these things are, but they keep coming out of the wall and biting me in half.
Think happy thoughts and take a shower later
death count: 115
Many deaths later and finally we’re fighting Queen Slug for a Butt….well…the slug butt part anyway.
my platform has googly eyes
death count: 124
There she is. The Evil Queen Pulsating, Bloated, Festering, Sweaty, Pus-filled, Malformed, Slug-for-a-Butt. She definitely lives up to her name. Ride around on the floating platforms, and shoot her in the face.
they say beauty is skin deep. but she’s ugly on the inside too.
death count: 129
She deserves it for locking up Princess-What’s-Her-Name.
a kiss for the hero
You did it Jim. You rescued the Princess. Go and claim your reward
damn you space cow
…But …But I won… I did good….
WHY COW?! WHY?!
I loved this game as a kid, and I love it just as much now. Sure, I could never beat it on the 3 lives and 1 continue you get during normal play, but it’s still a wonderful game. It’s funny and original, and just all around crazy. I died many time while playing, but they never felt cheap. The enemies are very patterned, and every death felt like my fault. Once you get the hang of the patterns, you can actually beat most of the game fairly easily. Even while playing my play through, it took me a dozen tries to make it to the boss of the stage, but once I did, I could clear the whole stage on a single life. The music is also fantastic and very memorable. Every so often, I still catch myself humming the “What the Heck” level theme song. All the environments are very unique and interesting with many hidden passages, and secret areas to find. Everyone should give this game a try. You won’t regret it.
yoink
Score: 9 / 10
Death Count: 129
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